How to create a relationship with Tarot
Your relationship with the Tarot begins the moment you become curious. Like any meaningful relationship, it grows through time, trust, patience, and shared experience. The more you invest in it, the more it reveals—not just about the cards, but about yourself. Learning Tarot isn't about memorizing cards and symbols—it's about building a relationship with your deck and allowing the images to speak through you.
That said, I strongly encourage starting at the beginning and learning what each card represents with the guidance of an experienced Tarot teacher. A solid foundation gives you something to build upon and helps you understand the language of the cards before your own intuition begins to shape the conversation.
As you spend more time reading, you'll notice subtle shifts in the way the cards speak to you. This is where your intuition awakens and your subconscious begins to participate more fully in the reading. Because the subconscious communicates through symbols, it's important to stay open rather than relying solely on memorized meanings.
Over time, your relationship with the cards deepens, and their messages evolve as you evolve, until you and the Tarot are speaking the same language. Energy also plays an important role. Whether you're reading for yourself or someone else, you'll naturally receive intuitive impressions. When reading for another person, you may pick up on feelings, symbols, or insights that don't make sense to you but resonate deeply with them.
So don't dismiss what comes through simply because you don't understand it. Trust what you're receiving. Often, the message isn't meant for you to interpret intellectually—it's meant for the other person to recognize. Those moments can open a doorway to profound insight and self-discovery.
Here are 6 steps to start you on a Tarot relationship of a lifetime.
1. Choosing Your First Tarot Deck
I recommend beginning with the Rider–Waite–Smith Tarot deck. It is the foundation of many modern Tarot decks and one of the easiest to learn from, with a wealth of books, courses, and resources available. You can always buy another deck later that resonates with your
2. Find a Good Teacher
Learning from an experienced Tarot teacher will give you a strong foundation. Look for reputable Tarot organizations or experienced local practitioners who teach Tarot as a tool for understanding, not just memorization.
3. Begin by Reading for Yourself
Before reading for others, spend time getting to know your own deck. Pull one card each day, then gradually move to two cards, three cards, and eventually simple spreads. This builds both confidence and trust in your own interpretations.
4. Spend Time in Quiet Reflection
Meditating with the cards is a beautiful way to deepen your connection. Each shuffle, each spread, and each reading strengthens your understanding of the Tarot and helps your intuition grow. Light a candle with or without scent to make it a full ritual experience.
5. Make the Cards Personal
Over time, your deck becomes a reflection of your own journey. As you sit with each card, ask yourself:
What does this card mean to me today?
What is it inviting me to understand?
How does it make me feel?
How can this wisdom support me right now?
There are no right or wrong answers—only an opportunity to know yourself more deeply.
6. Trust the Relationship.
Not every reading will make immediate sense, and some messages may feel symbolic or even mysterious. Give them time. Reflect on them, journal about them, and remain open. Often, life has a way of revealing the meaning when you're ready to see it.